Editor’s Note: All my graphics going forward will come directly from my new website, Stat Soldier. Go check it out by clicking here.
Last night, as I lay on the couch eating buy-one-get-one-free Mogu, I was unable to watch the Red Sox due to blackout restrictions. I had the live stats up on www.statsoldier.com and decided to put on the White Sox vs. the Royals instead.
The White Sox absolutely manhandled the Royals, putting up 22 runs. It was fun. However, every other player that stepped to the plate was a former member of the Boston Red Sox.
Now, I am a pretty positive guy. I think the Red Sox are a wagon, will sweep the Yankees this weekend, and go on a World Series run. But I wanted to try and come up with a Red Sox lineup of just former Red Sox players who are still in the league.
I immediately became depressed.
Here is what the Red Sox roster COULD look like, if they kept their guys.
C - Kyle Teel
Teel just came off the IL, so the stats aren’t there at the moment. Still, I think we could all agree he would be a step up from Mickey Gasper (mustache not included)
1B - Rafael Devers
Say what you want about Devers. Two years ago, everyone was kissing his feet. I’d still kiss his feet, given the opportunity, as a thank you for everything he did in Boston.
I have my feelings on who ruined Rafael Devers. Thankfully, that person is no longer with the organization either.
2B - Vaughn Grissom
At first glance, I thought, “Well, this is a stretch.” Then I remembered that Anthony Seigler (Who?) is playing 2B against the Yankees today.
SS - Xander Bogaerts
If I were to kiss Rafael Devers feet, you can only imagine what I would do for Xander Bogaerts. It is a travesty that he is wasting away in San Diego.
3B - Alex Bregman
Full disclosure, I wanted to put Blaze Jordan here. However, there are Red Sox fans on X that will try to ruin my life if I don’t mention how amazing Alex Bregman was to Boston.
LF - Andrew Benintendi
When I was a young man, I wrote a letter to Andrew Benintendi. It isn’t weird because we are the same age, and I did get a reply. It was from his agent at the time, who told me Andrew was on vacation, but that he would write back as soon as possible.
A month later, reports surfaced accusing the agent of installing cameras in his shower to record his clients.
I never got that letter from Andrew Benintendi.
I live with that every day.
CF - Braden Montgomery
Braden Montgomery was drafted in the first MLB Draft, which I actually sat and watched start to finish.
Never got to see him do anything with the Red Sox, as he was traded away for Garrett Crochet.
RF - Mookie Betts
I know what you are thinking.
“Why isn’t Alex Verdugo in this spot?”
Unfortunately, Alex had surgery and is not on any active roster. Don’t worry, the second he starts playing again, I will launch Mookie Betts into the sun.
DH - Kyle Schwarber
No comment.
SP - Chris Sale
It isn’t that the Red Sox's pitching is bad right now.
It’s just that Chris Sale is better.
SP - Kyle Harrison
I am fully convinced that Kyle Harrison had no desire to play for Boston. He self-sabotaged himself so that he could get traded. It is the only explanation for how he got so good immediately after he left.
Right?
SP - Nathan Eovaldi
Nathan should have been kept in Boston until he died for what he did in 2018. The biggest trend on this list is loyalty. If the Red Sox threw analytics and business to the side and just were loyal to their players, they would have a World Series-contending team still.
SP - Eduardo Rodriguez
Again, loyalty.
SP - Michael Wacha
If I am being honest, I totally forgot that Wacha played for the Red Sox.
That being said, he has averaged 2.6 bWAR a year since leaving.
CP - Kenley Jansen
Yeah, give me Chapman over this guy every day of the week.
If you haven’t already, please consider subscribing below.